Weight Of Loneliness

I'm still sick of it all.

No matter how much I make believe

I'm always taking the fall.

Trying to stand tall,

but life's not keen on bringing relief.

So I dwell on old songs,

helping me to grasp the essence of my past.

All the hate and anger is still there,

unchanged and hidden inside.

But it all fades compared

to the pressure on my chest.

The weight of loneliness

is a heavy burden to bear.

As I see everyone I've ever loved

move away from here.

Memory Lane

Legion are the roads that lead
through the soft sloping hills.
The sun guides a path through a forest.
But these roads hides no secrets anymore,
as I tread them like before.
After 3600 days since I first discovered my way.
It still takes me back,
down on this memory lane.
I see all seasons pass before me.
Tears spring into my eyes at the sight of it.
That one house in a dead end street,
used to be a haven for me to rest me soul.
It has been so long since I set foot inside.
Have I been lost ever since,
just trying to fill that endless gap?
I keep wondering as I continue my way,
looking for that same kind of solace.

History

Heavy thoughts caress my brain.
I recall the first meeting.
On a sunny day, waiting on a bench.
No clue of what to expect,
nor the consequences for the future.
There she was, and I wasn't ready.
I was loquaciously nervous,
couldn't seem to shut up.
While she just seemed to listen,
taking it all in.
It was weird to see the time fly.
Hours passed in a heartbeat,
I wished my heart would've just stopped.
The rest of this story is history.
To be forgotten by the ages.

Hidden Core

Shed a different light upon her.
As I see through the surface,
revealing her true colours.
She seems to rise above her shadow,
escaping the boundaries layed upon her.
How does she manage to hide it so well?
Captivated my thoughts as I learn yet more.
The shell seems thick, but its cracks
can't be hidden any longer.
I'm so very aware of her.
It's like I perceive her every move,
looking to see more of her.
I can't quite believe that
I didn't see it before.
That fragile little girl,
that was hidden in  her core.

All Night Lights

I remember your lights glowing
and fading in to darkness.
They give halo's to my dead memories.
Lost between reality and my feelings,
I still know hos safe I felt.
Had no cares, had no worries.
As I floated in your room,
wishing it'd last forever.
The nights were endless,
while your light shone all night long.
You scared away the shadows
from the deepest recesses of my mind.
You took me in, took me over.
I just didn't resist,
and let love take over.

Etched Skin

Lost and with a heavy heart
he makes his way through the fog.
Her name etched on his skin,
more present than ever.
He ponders over his decisions
only to conclude he made the right choice.
To take the path less taken
is a burden few are willing to bear.
The barren wasteland surrounds his every step.
Stripped trees stand tall, but dead inside.
The end of life as he knew,
with the shattered remains lying at his feet.
Lost in feelings, he clings on.
Longing for a better tomorrow.

Longest Day/Hardest Night

The minutes tick away as if they were hours.
Every breath weighs heavier as I try not too let it show.
The moment draws ever nearer and it scares me.
I know it's the right path to take,
but I fear the pain it'll inflict.
I can't be the cause.
Yet my own actions lead us here.
The words I speak sound surreal.
As if even I can't seem to believe
they come from my mind.
It tears down the fabric of everything we were.
And leaves us with memories of how we once used to be.
Guilt pushes me down,
all I ask is to pardon me.
How the fuck am I supposed to feel
when everything I known lies broken at my feet.