Stardust

Hear my sweet voice of desperation
running down your spine.
Feel my words turn cold as the night
lingers on.
The darkblue sky covered with diamonddust carries
my heart wherever my body strays.
I've suffered so much
I just can't bleed anymore...
As I stare into the candlelight,
I can feel that
Love's like stardust
all around me Yet unattainable
Non-existent.
An eon blue apocalypse submerges
me into an oblivion.
The air's so blue it blinds my senses.
Tears run down from my eyes
as I can't feel the pain anymore.
A state of numbing sights and sounds
Where nothing remains
but my illusions.

Distant strangers

Lost again
In a feeling of alienation.
The other end of a universe
Seperated by lightyears...
Or so it feels
out of sight, out of heart
passed on from the mind.
Seems so absurd, knowing where
we once both stood.
Silence turned wicked, which once
was pure solace.
Mute thoughts fail to escape
my mind.
Struck speachless by something,
something I can't grip.
I would regret losing you
I can't just lose another friend,
you just mean too much

Hope

When doubt pervades the mind and
a myriad of greyed out feelings wear you
down.
Feeling queasy and alone, insecure
about all and everything.
The cold silence tends to atrophy,
yet the thoughts remain the same.
If only there were perfect solutions
right in front...
Just close your eyes and try to see,
the epiphany which is waiting to be
unveiled.
Know there's something more foreseen
for you, even though you can't believe.
Even the smallest black star can shine bright
for you.
Reflect about this fact and realize,
you're already as special as can be.

Thoughts into words

Seeking inside, within
the unbearable Darkness of my mind.
Solutions and remedies, answers
of any kind.
But the silent solitude hides
them all.
Left standing, trying to feel...
There's no use in feeling
all the things I'm feeling
there's no one here to feel
with me


(Dedicated to Grietje)

Project grey

I wanted to believe that I was special.
But in the end I'm not.
I shouldn't belong
I shouldn't believe in this world
I shouldn't exist as does my dark side...
I'm starting to understand what she must be feeling for such a long time.
The weight of the own personality which drags one down. Wanting to believe,
wanting to be loved.
Yet only solitude submerges from the shadows of the mind.
What mind can bear this burden?
This horrible mental state which destroys more nerves than any illness.
Is there a cure?

Hollow life

All the times I pass through,
trying to find some good vibes.
Spent hours with friends
Laughed 'till I cried.
No matter what I try to feel
it's all so meaningless.
Feel so hollow without...
Leading a hollow life.
Living from one emotion
to another.
Trying to carry on,
to be strong.
While my heart cries out
to people who can't bother
to hear.
Empty, I just carry on.

City night

Sitting in a car surrounded
by the old city.
Never asleep with the orange
lights all over the streets.
Solitude in a city full of strangers.
Living lives next to one
another. Loneliness and indifference.
Cold and heartless world
where words don't mean
a thing.
Everyone turns cold as the night moves on.
False emotions shadow the
stars leaving a trace of
false hope.