High & dry

Alone I walk the mountainroad.
with my head in the clouds
so far apart from the one I need.
The summit seems unreal
Leaving me high and dry.
Clueless about distance without
any certainties.
The damp dabs my being.
Lost inside the mist where
the roads cease to exist.
My heart burns and pounds.
So I move on,
ignoring my chilled bones
and lone feelings.
Replacing them with something more.
And hope breaks through the fog.

Keep me whole

Back in the beginning I never
really knew just what to expect.
So much anxiety of being in love
once more.
Afraid to open up and put my
trust in you.
Terrified of ever being hurt again
and end up in solitude.
Will you ever create despair?
Will you ever give me grief?
Those were my thoughts 'till I
just let loose.
Banned my painful past and
accepted my present love.
Finding you here makes me feel,
brings me warmth & solace.
You know my soul
and hope you never let go.

White Noise

Silence swerves in this place
searching for the dying sounds...
All seems ever so eternally still
amidst this ever revolving world.
Leaves are mute as the wind stops sighing.
Even the twinkling stars enjoy this peaceful
moment in the cold autumn night.
I'm just inhaling it all in a state of inner peace.
One with the silence
Empty of grief and despair.
This white noise surrounds my soul.
It takes me far away. Right there
where I would like
to be.

Inside

All the sweet words and softest gestures that
you gave. You presence while you're far away.
I've taken it inside, as I feel you in my heart.
The rain stopped pouring on me and the flood
of tears has ceased.
Your gentle understanding and mutual thoughts
set me free.
Freed my mind to tell it all. Shared experiences,
advice and support as you need it.
Made me feel special as you speak your truth.
I wish I could take your pains away and
cast them away in the black starry night.
Let me show you how much you mean to me.
And I do know the words, but I don't dare to speak them
to you.
You know I'll be there like you want me to be...
(Dedicated to Fietje)

Sleepy insomniac

I need to sleep but don't feel like it.
Feels like I'm waiting for something or someone.
Time goes by, distance as well as the wheels keep spinning.
Images reflect from my eyes as I pass by this revolving world.
People living with their residuel self image leaving blurred lines in my
accumulating grey mass.
Pieces of a dream pass me by, clearly dividing reality from my imagination...
Eyes that see me through without I've said a thing.
Trying to attain the particles and puzzle them together.
But the softest breeze spreads them around.
My shadow reaches while I attempt to stay impartial.
Subconciousness tells it what to do while I just let it flow.
Hope arises while a ray of light hits the ceiling and my shadow fades.
How can I remain the same?
As I stare and dream awake of the things which matter most.
I just change and meet myself again in a place long forgotten

Stardust

Hear my sweet voice of desperation
running down your spine.
Feel my words turn cold as the night
lingers on.
The darkblue sky covered with diamonddust carries
my heart wherever my body strays.
I've suffered so much
I just can't bleed anymore...
As I stare into the candlelight,
I can feel that
Love's like stardust
all around me Yet unattainable
Non-existent.
An eon blue apocalypse submerges
me into an oblivion.
The air's so blue it blinds my senses.
Tears run down from my eyes
as I can't feel the pain anymore.
A state of numbing sights and sounds
Where nothing remains
but my illusions.

Distant strangers

Lost again
In a feeling of alienation.
The other end of a universe
Seperated by lightyears...
Or so it feels
out of sight, out of heart
passed on from the mind.
Seems so absurd, knowing where
we once both stood.
Silence turned wicked, which once
was pure solace.
Mute thoughts fail to escape
my mind.
Struck speachless by something,
something I can't grip.
I would regret losing you
I can't just lose another friend,
you just mean too much