Wasted years

Resuscitating my strange life with
a bitter feeling. Resent the periods of
pain and down depressions.
The agony I willingly suffered, made
it me.
Bittered and bleary living my life.
Not doing anything to gain a newfound
happyness. Waiting for past love to relive.
So many wasted years, dreaming of something
so distant and yet all around.
Wasn't hard to fail, yet not easy to win.
Looking in vain, beneath the black ice.
Deep in the cold liquid, surrounding me
while drifting away.