Paranoia

Why am I so worried these weeks? Scared
of the one thing that I fear most.
Can't lose you. The very thought makes me cry.
Cut my skin when I feel insecure, watch the
flesh heal 'till the scars appear.
Something's changed in you. Like you're holding back on
me, it makes me doubt on myself. I remember
when nothing mattered, that your love overwhelmed me.
When I could drown in the sweet words you sent me.
Time seems to have changed, deformed into something I
don't recognize anymore.
Will I ever feel your body next to me again, while sleeping
or hugging...
When I need to miss you, my mind plays tricks on me. No
wonder that I don't feel right. Start maiming myself in the
head and skin. I don't wanna feel lonely, just want
some love and certainty in this life of mine.
This selfish life which doesn't deserve your love.
People around me get hurt and I don't want to rejoin
them. Shake off this paranoia and return back to my
senses. I wanna renew my vow. Renew
my unconditional love.