Dislocated

Wandering in my room, wondering what this feeling inside is.
No clear emotion or did I forget how it feels to love...
Locked away from the world living in the shell that protected
me from everything but myself.
Slumbering in this so called "safe" place which was my own.
Fucking with my own head, hurting every day. Talking to
myself in the dark going slightly mad. No trace of trespassers or curious
people. Left alone with my own.
No one to listen even the shadows are still and dark, reaching
in my mind.
Time goes by, deprivated from the outside. Apatheticly staring
in the dark.
Bleeding inside, drowned in the red pool within.
Now I know what I feel. It is love that I feel mixed with
fear. No love for myself but someone out there, accompanied with
fear. Scared of the inevitable, of returning to my corner.
Being sentenced for my imperfection. Nobody loves imperfection,
being shallow and inspecting the outside.
Bury me for just a while and try to realize the meaning of
unconditional love.
I don't wanna live life lonely