Twisted mind

I look at you. You don't seem to notice how my eyes
rest on you. Considered as a friend I'm around you.
Just friendship when I'm around, when I talk to you.
But my heart pounds harder when I see you, the feeling
inside feels like the soft rain on a burning day.
I've known you for awhile but never expressed
how I feel. Sure that you don't feel the same way and
scared to tell.
This subliminal feeling hasn't faded in time. While
I kept staring my mind got twisted and sick.
How can I continue this life while loving you? Grasping
my mind, fake my friendly feelings during your presence.
Your endless smile makes me long for happyness. Your
beautiful character increases my desire for my own catharsis.
This unreal scenario thrives me into an uncertain,
confused state of mind.
Trapped between the walls of doubt. Suffocating because
of the pain. Feel me in your arms and forget what
it's like to be my friend...