Contained fear

Fearfully sitting on the edge of the bridge.
Lone like a bottle inthe sand, with a silent
message inside.
Like the past, unable to control this immobile reality.
Don't want to live in a vicious circle, repeating
my past life again.
Anxiety spreading like the sea over the sand.
Afraid that it might happen again. Another situation
but the same pain like a mindnumbing drug,
tearing on my feelings.
How can I ever doubt my feelings for you?
How can I interpret your signs as often you don't
know yourself?
I must contain my fear, myself. Just
realized I can never win...